Shyt me not, and i'll tell no lies

This story
is hard to believe.
Even for me.
But every
word of it is true and it really, really did happen. So let me take you back a couple of months to give you some
jump into my time machine.
Not long
ago, I signed on a new client with a very important condition.
“Do you have a programmer and a designer on
your team? Because I don’t want to make any landing pages or have to deal with any
of the sales aspect.
“I JUST want to generate traffic. It’s what I
do best and I’d rather focus on that.”
The client
assured me they had the other stuff covered and we could get started right
Now I was
very excited about starting this project. They had an awesome funnel that would
convert traffic to money right quick.
So I pushed the project along. And we met
briefly so I could explain what I needed to happen on their landing page before
I could begin driving traffic.
The client
was responsive, and he added his staff and myself to a project so we’d have
an open channel of communication.
soon, they built the first version of the landing page.
EVERYTHING was wrong.
It had NONE
of the things I talked about, and everything I warned should NOT be there.
So I wrote out
one of those emails I’m famous for…which praise your work and then say there’s
a few changes I need done…
And then
there’s 3 pages of instructions telling you how to completely change the whole
thing because it’s total absolute fugking rubbish.
week later, they had a new page up.
But it
still had all the things I said not to have. And the programmer worked freaking
slow. There were 4 people working on this thing…and I’ve singlehandedly built
such landing pages in hours without a designer, programmer, copywriter, or any gnarly
To speed
things along, I decided to jump in myself and make the necessary changes.
I wish I hadn’t
gone in there.
What I found
was a total MESS.
They were using a “shortcut tool” that was meant to make
producing such landing pages simple…
It did not.
It made
them messy and I had to spend a pile of time fighting the tool to make it do
what I wanted.
Two hours
later, we had a landing page ready to go.
It was
their turn this time.
“Jim, this button isn’t centered properly on
the page…it’s leaning to the right.”
But it was sitting on a line with other text that had to be
shifted right to keep focus on the button.
No sooner
did they say that, then their idiot programmer jumped in there to make the
Frustrated, I told the
guy to stop fugking with the page and fixed it myself. Took me another 4 hours
to undo his mess.
That same
day, I started the ad campaign.
That same day
we got traffic and sales quite profitably.
At this
point, I decided I’d redesign the entire page myself and build it from scratch.
The old one was UGLY as sin, wasn’t responsive on mobile, and totally sucked
butt. It looked like something my uncle’s pet goat wiped its butt with.
So 24 hours
later, I had a BEAUTIFUL version of the page…
It was
almost identical in its content and structure…but far prettier and much more impressive.
There was a
colour scheme, everything was coordinated nicely, there was javascript-based
animations…It looked good no matter your screen size, I even hand-drew images
The works.
And I thought to myself quite proudly, SURELY if the ugly page designed by their shyt programmer was converting…then
my professionally designed version would do even better.
After showing the
client my version, i told him to fire that fugkin arsehole poser programmer and
find a new one.
Lead flow
dropped to almost NIL.
Surely I’d
screwed something up in the campaign.
I went in
and made changes to the campaign and tried again.
conversions were wiped out. Nothing!
Alright, I decided.
Let’s alternate the two versions of the landing page. The ugly old version vs
my pretty new version, maybe by some chance there’s an issue with MY page.
24-hours later, the results were in.
I couldn’t
believe my eyes.
The ugly
old page was outperforming and outselling the new one by a CRAZY margin.
It made
absolutely NO SENSE.
I mean, if
you had a slightly smaller screen than what the page was designed on, the
entire layout would fall apart. Text would get chopped. Elements would overlap.
It would be a total disaster.
Can you imagine what it would look like on a mobile device?
Hey and I was
driving traffic from mobile like crazy!
But there
it was in black and white.
The old ugly page was outperforming my new pretty
page by a RIDICULOUS margin.
For the
next few days, I experimented further with getting my page to be a closer match
in content and structure, while retaining the responsive design I’d done.
And in
every test I tried, the old page killed my new page.
In the end,
i had to fold and shamefully admit that the ugly page designed and hacked together
by an amateur programmer, the one with no colour scheme, mismatched colours, gory
buttons that broke into two lines…the page that was literally unreadable on a mobile device…
…converts better.
Better than
the professionally designed one I’d put so much thought into colour coordinating
and into designing its responsiveness.
Better than the page that you could actually read and use if you arrived from a mobile ad.
explanation do I have?
I can’t
make sense of it.
I just have to accept it.
And when
you’re marketing online, that can often be the case.
ugly outperforms pretty.
pretty outperforms ugly.
There’s no
way to know for sure….you just have to test.
But here’s
the kick in the throat.
If you don’t
have traffic flowing consistently, there will be nothing to test. No results to
report. No way to know what works and what doesn’t.
You just
have to keep guessing and losing.
with most traffic sources online, you’re going to get very intermittent traffic
in small quantity.
It’s never consistent enough to run any real tests or get
conclusive results.
But if you
use my KickStart method, getting traffic is just something you switch on and
leave alone.
You can go focus on turning the traffic into money…instead of on generating the traffic.
That’s the
fun stuff.
The stuff
that gives you entertaining adventures like mine.
Don’t you
think that would be more fun?
you like to tell a story like this one day?
Surely it’s
more fun than sitting on your hands waiting for traffic from Facebook, SEO, blogs, and
Check out
Traffic KickStart today. It turns ON your traffic.
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Jim Yaghi

Jim Yaghi

Foremost Home Business traffic expert, Jim Yaghi is a Computer Scientist and Mathematician who used to build search engines for a living. At 16 he created a mildly popular social network and has been an online entrepreneur for over 15 years. In 2006 he rose to the #1 Affiliate rank in many Home Business programs (most notably Magnetic Sponsoring). Today he's best known for hatching the first industry-wide viral campaign to reach all major social networks, for hosting a top-10 Internet radio show for entrepreneurs, and for shattering industry sales records with his best-selling, easy-to-follow online marketing courses PPC Domination, PPC Supremacy, and Traffic KickStart.

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